June, 2008 | BeautyStat.com
 

June 2008

Beautiful eyes can make your significant others melt when they stare into those liquid pools of blue. But remember Kenny Rogers' horrific eyelid surgery that made him look like a Mattel creation seriously gone wrong? The eyes are also the first areas to make cringe. Since the age of 19, I have tried a more lotions and potions for my eye zone than I would care to legally disclose to my boyfriend. My skin has gone through trench warfare from the constant use of dermatological acids, injections and laser treatments. So when I discovered the incredibly potent quartet of products from Emerge Labs called the "i" line, I felt St. Peter had kicked me through the pearly gates of heaven.
The green movement has brought us cool things like Goji berry, acai, green tea, coffeeberry… the list goes on and on. But now nature’s dark underbelly is yielding up a whole new generation of skincare products with ingredients that boggle the imagination. Cow’s colostrum, anyone? In a crowded field, beauty companies are doing anything to break away from the pack. Now that every fruit, nut, berry and mineral has been spoken for, they’re raiding the animal kingdom to come up with The Next Big Thing. This is called a “unique selling proposition.” Unique? That’s putting it mildly. Consider Syence Skon Care Laboratories’ Skin Venom Memory Cream. (Why would anyone want to remember a thing like that?) It boasts something called Synake, which is a snake venom peptide that supposedly mimics Botox. Our faces are already frozen in horror. Then there’s Profael Specialty Skins Nourishment, which fights wrinkles with natural bee mucus extract. Thanks, but we’d rather keep our crow’s feet. (Actually, we’re just waiting for crow’s feet to pop up in one of these formulations.)

Chanel probably doesn’t care that commodity prices are actually increasing. Its fall makeup collection features gold as prominently as Gwen Stefani features red lipstick. You can toss that bottle of Black Satin nail polish out the window (too bad you spent your theatre money on getting...

Following the heels of Smashbox-O Gloss's phenomenal success comes a tool that no lady should be without, especially during pucker-up season. Tricia Sawyer's Clearly Pretty Color Revealing Lip Gloss made us kiss every strange boy, dog and girl in sight, and people were pushing us...

Magnolia Blossom Remember the day when our moms' skincare regimens consisted of Pond's Cold Cream? "Hope in a jar", the ads gushed (and hope was an excellent choice of word to use when describing this cold cream that fights dry skin but little else). Hey, it was a heck lot better than dousing your face in precious milk during the Great Depression. R&D scientists who regularly put out cosmetic-oriented studies must be scriptwriters for SNL. One of the latest tests: Some 300 women of all ages who used anti-aging creams and other beauty treatments were interviewed by researchers from the University of Bath and Qatar University (that's a partnership even the U.N. wouldn't have thought of.) Among women who didn't see hoped-for results, 73 percent continued using the ineffective products or treatments. But among women who thought the treatments or products were successful, 55 percent had stopped using them. Whoa! Who are these women? I want to know which lady continues using a product even if it doesn't work (if this is the case: manufacturers of Pet Rock, take note. You can make a comeback).
Some products look cuter on TV than they do in real life. They make your heart strings go zing during those commercial breaks and make you want to rush out to the store and buy some for your grandma, your pet hamster,even your ex. Until you reach the checkout counter and realize you already have one of these sitting on your dusty shelf and you just spent $8 that you could have otherwise plonked down on 1.33 lattes from Starbucks. Unfortunately, Veet In-Shower Hair Removal Cream (www.veet.us) is one of them. I was excited to try it as much as I was excited to shove my wedding cake all over my husband's face; but although this hair remover does give you stubble-free skin for a few days, I felt I was much better off shaving.
It's almost as fun as winning a Golden Ticket from Willy Wonka or seeing Britney Spears sashay at the MTV Video Music Awards last year when even her shoes completely failed the Breathalyzer. It's cute, it's quick and it's soft as a rabbit's foot, and you'll never remove makeup the same way again (yes, toss those Medieval era liquid makeup remover bottles off your rooftop). Trust Jane Iredale to keep us entertained post and pre revelry. The Magic Mitt is made with micro-fibers that are several times thinner than human hair and when they become wet, they can remove surface tension of oils in makeup. Our mascara disappeared like Michael Jackson's original nose and our stubborn blush, foundation and cheek stain became passe with just one use. The mitt also promotes the health of the skin because its natural acid mantle is unaffected.
Frankly, we're getting tired of giving you stories that link cancer and makeup. We're not sure what R&D scientists are out there gunning for those of us wearing lipstick and eye shadow, but it sure sounds like they want us to look like Charlize Theron in Monster: unkempt, unwashed, sans makeup. Thanks to scientists from Baylor University Medical Center in Dallas, Texas, you can now feel really scared wearing innocent lip gloss. Here's the official start to the story: